Friday 25 June 2010

Back to work?

Is it a good time to go back to work, or not? This is a question...
I have stayed at home for the last year. I thought it was important
that I was "on call" and available at all times during Cirwen's first
year in secondary school. This also coincided with Little Dragon's
first year in the nursery.

As you know from my previous posts, it proved to be the right
decision, as there were so many problems. Most of the bullying
issues have been sorted. Cirwen grew up emotionally and
socially during this time and developed a lot of new coping skills.
She achieved so much, she has been recognised, she excelled in
her subjects of interest.

But. I know, there always be a but, because I am so protective...
It doesn't mean all the problems are solved and there will be
new issues next year.

On the other hand, I can't just stay home for ever and when the phone
calls pick it up thinking "is she crying or is she happy?". I need
a bit of my own separate life. Away.

I am searching half heartedly, at the moment, as I still fight with
my own thoughts. Am I ready to let her be even more independent?
Is she ready for that? Will my new employer understand the challenges
we are facing every day just to lead a normal life, and that sometimes
a usually a small problem turns into tragedy? For many businesses
hiring a mother means days off to deal with children's sickness, school
plays etc. Hiring a mother of an Autistic child may seem a higher
risk.

Well, I'll see how it goes. I am back in the job market. With all my
fears, I cannot forget that I am not alone and if I can't deal with
something there's always their Dad. My darling husband, who
has been looking after Cirwen all those primary school years while
I was working full time. I realise now, I have taken over with
a thoughtless force of I'm here now, I will do it.... I'm sorry dear G.

5 comments:

  1. Why not work part-time, or work from home. Your concern over your girl is understandable. You have not stifled her but your constant support has given her courage. But I know you need space of your own... Well, a job is fine, it's not like you can't leave it again when circumstances call for it. :) All the best Libertine! God bless. :)

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  2. I agree with Jane, why not a part-time job to start with. Whatever you decide Libertine I know there will be much thought behind the decision. Cirwen has come a long way in the past year with your support but maybe it's time for her to depend a bit more on herself.

    Blessings,
    Judy

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  3. Like the others, part-time may be the way to go for a while, help everyone get into a routine. Whatever you do, don't feel guilty for making that choice.

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  4. i dont mean to echo the above, (and its been a while since someone said something), but I would think go part time, and keep doing the sewing, eventually, you might even be able to drop the part time and do the costume making full time :), G should get some sides of leather, and get himself making stuff with that. a right old costume business.

    from that lovable scamp that sometimes steals your sofa :D

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  5. Thanks my dear friends. Part time unfortunately might not be enough to feed us all... However... home working would be just perfect! Now just try to find the one which is not a scam lol.

    Well, I decided not to rush, take only something I'll really enjoy, and see what the fate throws at me :-)

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